Distracted by constant thought had left my mind unhinged from being present, creating a world of sadness as I repeated the same negative behaviors of my demanding thoughts. These mental beatings never moved me away from the melancholy, instead they forced me to escape my reality, leaving me exhausted in the chaotic world my mind created while life ticked effortlessly by.
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All these negative images scrolling through my brain like a motion picture, removing any thoughts of peace from my days, until finally I knew change was necessary.
The first step on my journey forward was forgiveness; I had to release the pain that was holding me back with compassion. Sending this gift to the trappings, which held me captive, was a treasure to myself. Surrendering to the grip my tangled emotions were holding onto invigorated me, pulling me from the deep ocean waves and allowing me to breath in with newly found peace and lightness.
Learning to be present established the acceptance I needed while bringing clarity to my days. If I hurt, I needed to allow the discomfort to sit with me until eventually accepting the pain associated with it. This mind chatter helped me discover the damage I was running from and begin facing it. A climate that reassured I could let it in, and eventually send it packing as the metamorphosis of change progressed.
Over time the muddled pieces slowly fell away and positive lessons formed, all with such precision, I finally felt the balance that had been missing as life began to shift in a new direction. Unraveling to become a better person, with love and authenticity leading the way had reminded me that sometimes falling apart can be the best thing that happens to you. Allowing me to taste the difficulty that had surrounded me until I untangled the message it came to teach.
When our heartache is buried inside it continues its destruction, chewing at our souls and claiming hostage to the sadness it bears. As you share your story, the power it once held diminishes and the struggle starts to dissipate. The goal is to seek the truth, regardless of the difficulties. When you tell your truth, it becomes a part of your past. When you tell a lie, it becomes a part of your future. To be set free, it is time to validate your truth.
Change occurs when we enable things to transpire in their own time, following their development, while always keeping ourselves present. Allowing our lives to unravel before we recognize the necessary transformation can be a long process, and the truest evolution arrives when we least expect it; these changes are often lessons we would not have chose. Altering our seemingly calm life as it violently disrupts everything.
Years later, when I looked back at the spell of sadness, I resented the time I wasted on my struggle to let go. Halted on a quest for answers that would never arrive, until I realized the resolution was within me all along. The lessons from this new beginning that was unfolding before me, allowed me to awaken with tenderness through that seasons struggle while appreciating the new road before me.
Life evolves with the ebb and flow of peaceful and positive mixing with turbulence and uncertainty. Often the path to transformation appears bleak, especially when drenched in heartbreak. The defeat you once encountered will be the beacon that sheds new light on your days; and once given enough space, you will discover the strength it delivered.