Subscribe To The Personal Growth Newsletter
Get your daily dose of improving yourself for the better in your inbox everyday!

How To Boost Your Man’s Confidence When He Is Feeling Insecure

Everyone has moments of insecurity in their lives, but those times can be especially trying when you’re in a relationship with someone who is insecure. As women, it makes sense to want to nurture a partner who feels that way and make him feel better.

There are many ways to go about this. It will help strengthen and improve your partnership with your significant other because you will feel like he needs you, and he’ll know that he can count on you during tough times and that you will come through for him. Of course, if this insecurity gets in the way of a positive relationship, it might be time to help your partner seek counseling or other help so that he can feel better about himself, which will improve the interactions you have with one another.

In the meantime, try one of these techniques to boost your significant other’s confidence and self-worth and you’ll both be happier for it. You may be successful with just one of them, or you may have to mix and match several of them to see the results you want. The trick is to do these things without telling your partner that’s what you’re doing. Otherwise, he may feel like you aren’t being genuine and are just looking out for yourself and how it makes you feel when he’s insecure.

Demonstrate Genuine Appreciation

People who feel insecure are usually very good at knowing when you are just trying to be nice and when you really mean what you say. When your partner is feeling bad about himself, be sure that when you offer appreciation, it is true rather than just being a way to help bring him out of his funk. Take some time to really figure out what you appreciate most about your mate and why you are appreciative of those things.

When you go to your partner to express your appreciation, it’s a great idea to tell him what you appreciate and why you appreciate it. When you approach things this way, it’s clear that you mean it and that you’ve given it some thought. Avoid just saying something in the moment to make him feel better, because that will usually backfire on you in the end. Some people will love having a heartfelt message that portrays everything you appreciate about him, which you can leave somewhere for him to find when he needs it the most.

Pay Him Compliments

One of the best ways to make a man feel better about himself is to pay him some compliments. You might not think that men like to be told nice things as much as women, but experts say that one surefire way to boost confidence in a male is to tell him what you love about him. That might be the way he looks, how smart he is or how proficient he is at taking care of your children. Offer up compliments on a consistent basis and your partner should start feeling better about himself in no time. Additionally, if someone says something nice about him, relate that information to him. The more people telling him how great he is, the higher the chances that he’ll start to believe it.

Be Supportive

If your partner is feeling less than confident because he lost his job or wants to move up the ladder, but doesn’t have the qualifications, your heartfelt support is a great way to help him feel better about himself. Motivational speakers and clergy often tell their audience that nothing is insignificant, so be sure you remind your significant other of this on a regular basis. Let him know why what he does is important and what it means to you that he does it to help your relationship flourish. If your partner wants to go back to school or switch careers, your support can help him navigate the insecure feelings that go along with a big change like this. Knowing that you are in his corner no matter what should give him the confidence boost he needs to chase his dreams.

Offer True Advice

It’s easy to tell someone what to do, especially someone as close to you as a spouse or partner. However, if you are aiming to help yours become more confident and less insecure, you have to be careful with offering advice. Make sure that you are giving it with love so that he knows you are only trying to help him rather than just telling him what to do or trying to get him to stop feeling bad. Most people need someone to help them figure out big decisions or work out a problem. Your partner will feel a whole lot more secure when he knows that he can come to you for help and that you will truly give him what he needs rather than making him feel worse or by blowing him off because you don’t know what to do. He might not take your advice, but he will love knowing that you have his back and are there to help him anytime you can.

Make Him A List

In the throes of insecurity it can be hard to remember the good qualities about yourself. If your partner is feeling insecure, chances are that’s where he’s at right now. If you have decided you want to step in and help, making a list of everything good about him is a great idea. On your list include the qualities and traits you love about him, list all of his accomplishments and anything else you think will help. Give him this list to remind him why he’s so great and why you are lucky to have him in your life. Hang the list where he can see it anytime he needs a boost, and add to it as you think of additional things that belong on the list.

Insecurity is a normal part of life and something that everyone will feel at some point or another. It’s entirely fine for your partner to feel this way from time to time, but always being insecure could indicate a larger issue. If he’s always down in the dumps, he could be suffering from depression. You might need to have a heart to heart about seeking additional help from a mental health provider.

Pin ItDepression can be treated, but if it’s ignored it can interfere with quality of life, relationships, and jobs and can even harm a person’s health or lead to suicide. If you feel out of your realm, urge your significant other to seek help as soon as possible. This will be good for both of you. A general practitioner can give you a referral to a good mental health specialist who can help you and your partner get to the bottom of the problem and provide you with techniques and tips that you can both use to help work through the insecurity and get back to the healthy relationship and quality of life you both want for each other.

Table Of Contents

Katherine Hurst
By Heather Redwood
Heather Redwood graduated from Penn State University with a Speech Communication degree, and specializes in communication therapy. She has logged over 15,000 hours in one-to-one sessions with men and women, helping them to cope with codependency issues and love and sex addiction. She also specializes in online dating and marriage counselling.

Join the Conversation

Personal Growth logo
Daily personal growth affirmations, words of wisdom and articles sent straight to your inbox every day...
© 2012-2023 | Greater Minds Ltd. All Rights Reserved.
Personal Growth is for informational purpose only and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. All content and images found on may not be reproduced or distributed, unless permitted in writing by Greater Minds Ltd.