Most people aim to live a life that is both happy and productive. There are many ways to get there, and they might differ from person to person. When your goal is to be fulfilled, you can eliminate some things from your life to help you achieve that goal.
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Experts have spent countless hours researching happiness through a myriad of studies, and they have come to several conclusions regarding lifelong happiness. You probably know what things you should be doing to make yourself happy.
However, perhaps you didn’t realize that there are also several things you should not be doing. Stop doing the following things, and there is a good chance you’ll be feeling happier in no time.
1. They Never Rely On Others For Self-Worth
Your self-worth has to come from within, so hoping that others will validate you and make you feel like a good person is futile. Yes, certain people in your life will make you feel worthy and important, including your spouse, your parents and your friends.
However, this isn’t true for everyone and no matter how many people you have on your side, there will always be a few more who don’t care if you fail and aren’t going to go out of their way to make you feel good about yourself.
The lesson here is that you have to quit worrying about what others think and let their judgments roll off your back. Remember that you are the only one living your life and you are the only one who has the power to grant true happiness. Once you realize that, the rest will likely follow.
2. They Aren’t Resentful
Everyone experiences instances that make them resentful. The trick to staying happy is to not live in a perpetual state of resentment. Whether you’re hanging onto your feelings due to your own mistakes or someone else’s, it’s time to offer forgiveness to yourself or the ones who wronged you, even if they didn’t ask for it and don’t want it.
There is something incredibly freeing about forgiving someone. Rather than doing it for another person, you’ll find that forgiveness frees you and makes you happier. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you are saying that wrongs are acceptable; instead, it’s about giving yourself the inner peace you need to stay happy and live the life you want to live, no matter what everyone else is doing or what has happened to you in the past.
3. They Don’t Ask Others For Happiness
There is no doubt that other people can make you immensely happy. Anyone who has a fulfilling marriage or young children can tell you that. However, truly happy people don’t rely on others for their happiness. People who are unhappy are generally those who feel that if they just had more, they would be happier.
Whether this means a bigger house, a higher paycheck, a more understanding spouse or a job that feeds a passion, always feeling like your life isn’t enough for happiness is a sure way to be miserable.
Take responsibility for your own happiness and you’ll feel better immediately. Make the choice to find joy in your life right now and stop worrying about what more money, different people in your life or a brand new job can do for you.
4. They Stay Away From Negative Things
You can’t totally avoid the negative things in life, but you do have some measure of control over how long you choose to stay in those environments. Perhaps your boss is a naturally negative person or your sick mother can’t find anything good in her life anymore.
Spending lots of time with those people can rub off on you and cause you to see the negative side of things more often than not. Experts recommend limiting your time in such negative situations. Your best bet is to walk away when possible and immerse yourself in positive things to counteract the bad.
Have drinks with your best friend, talk over the good parts of the day with your kids, or do whatever it takes to keep yourself in a positive frame of mind, and happiness will soon follow.
5. They Keep Their Nose Out Of Other People’s Business
Paying too much attention to what others are doing is a recipe for unhappiness. After all, it only gives you the opportunity to see how much better everyone else has it and how you don’t measure up.
When you see someone getting a promotion, getting engaged or finding out they will become a parent, it can be easy to fall into the trap of thinking that other people’s lives are going so well when yours might not be.
The best favor you can do for yourself is stop worrying about everyone else and focus on your own happiness. Start a gratitude journal in which you record the things you are thankful for each day.
Even if it’s just a great cup of coffee, this gratefulness will shape your way of thinking and you’ll notice more happiness in no time at all. Remember that you are living your own life and it shouldn’t compare to anyone else’s. You never know – someone might be looking at your life and wishing for what you have. There’s greatness in each day, so look for it and you’ll be on your way to true joy.
6. They Resist The Truth
Living on lies might make you look happier and may even help you reach goals, but things will eventually fall apart. Keeping up a facade can be draining and will erase your happiness in the long run. Instead of painting a different picture, consider letting your truth hang out there.
There’s nothing wrong with not having the biggest house on the block or the newest car. You can still be happy, even if others have those things. You don’t owe anyone an explanation and you have to focus on your own happiness, not what other people think about you. Stop trying to hide behind a pretty picture and simply be who you are. You will be amazed at how liberating this is and how much happier you’ll be once you let go of the lies.
Happiness is attainable for virtually everyone. However, if you make changes and don’t see results or if you feel down in the dumps more often than not, it could be time to see a professional. Depression is a mental disorder that doesn’t discriminate. It can happen to anyone, young or old, man or woman.
Depression is something that requires treatment, so if you worry that you could be suffering from it, see your doctor for a referral to a mental health professional right away. Through therapy and medication, you can control your symptoms and live the happy life you want and deserve. Isn’t that something to take action for today?