Everyone wants to feel as if they are liked by others around them. If you feel like people don’t like you, you probably want to make changes so that you can be more likable. It turns out that’s not so hard to do.
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With a little bit of time, patience and practice, you can be someone that everyone likes. It might not be easy, but it will pay off in the end since forming close relationships is important to good mental health.
Consider these following traits, which experts say make a person one that people tend to like. Spend some time fostering these traits, and you’ll love the payoff.
1. Natural Curiosity
You probably don’t like a person who only cares about themselves, right? Other people will feel the same way about you. People who are curious and interested in what other people care about are much more likable than those who only want to talk about their own things.
Be enthusiastic about other people’s passions and they’ll naturally want to be your friend. Ask them questions about themselves, and show an interest in what they like and feel good about.
2. Be On Time
Nothing is more frustrating than agreeing to meet someone at a given time, only to sit there and wait for extended amounts of time. When you make people wait on you, you’re essentially telling them that they aren’t that important to you.
Making an effort to arrive when you say you will makes you a much more likable person, so make an effort to show up when you agree to from here on out. If you struggle, set your clocks ahead a little bit so that you always arrive a few minutes earlier than you think you are.
3. You’re Appreciative
Being ungrateful doesn’t make for a very good friend. When you go out of your way to do something nice for someone, it’s important to feel appreciated. You know how it feels when you don’t get the gratitude you want or feel you deserve. If you want to be likable, you must be thankful and appreciative when people do nice things for you.
You also want to be humble about your achievements when people give you praise. This is especially important when you collaborate on projects at the office. Being likable offers a certain sense of job security, so you want your co-workers to like you.
4. Honesty Is Important
Lying to people is never a good way to be liked. Others certainly don’t appreciate being told lies and won’t be trusting of you when you do. You don’t have to be hurtful, but being honest in most situations will make you likable in a brand new way. At the same time, don’t pretend to be someone you aren’t.
This kind of falseness won’t endear you to anyone, so be genuine and truthful about yourself, and you’ll attract people who like you for who you are. You might be surprised to find that something you think should be a secret actually makes you more likable.
5. You Need To Be Helpful
People like those who help them out and take care of them when the need arises. When you extend your help to those around you, you become more likable. Make a point to lend a hand when someone needs it, and they’ll always want to be around you.
At the same time, caring about others makes you a likable person. When you are helpful and caring toward other people, chances are that they will be helpful and caring to you in return. When someone asks for help, try to make an effort to do what they need.
6. Stay Happy And Positive
No one wants to be around someone who is always negative and unhappy. It’s just not fun to spend time with people like that. If you’re someone who is pessimistic and tends to look on the bad side of things, you might not be all that likable. Being happier won’t occur overnight, but you can take steps to improve your outlook on life so that you are naturally more positive and attractive to other people.
Make an effort to stay positive, and people will want to be around you all the time. Seek out what makes you happy, and your mood should improve accordingly. If you have trouble being happy, see a therapist to rule out depression.
7. You Can’t Be Judgmental
People hate being judged and won’t like people who do judge them. You need to remember that everyone is different and has traits that make them unique and special. By keeping your mind open like this, you are less likely to judge those around you and will be more likable in the process.
If you do find yourself judging others, try to keep it to yourself so that it isn’t quite so obvious. Feeling accepted makes people more comfortable around you, which translates to being likable.
8. You Don’t Need All The Attention
This goes along with being curious about people. If you have to be the center of attention all the time, it makes other people feel undervalued and less important. To be truly likable, you have to let others have their time in the spotlight as well. Pay attention to what other people love and allow them to showcase it instead of stealing their thunder by inserting yourself into the situation.
9. Be Empathetic
Empathy means you can put yourself in other people’s shoes and get a sense of how that person is feeling, even if you’ve never experienced exactly what that person is going through. Take time to get to know people and really pay attention to their life and issues so that you can see things from their perspective. This will make you naturally more likable, and you’ll find it much easier to make friends.
Further Reading: What Are Empaths? 14 Empath Traits And Scientific Theories
10. Be A Good Listener
Being a good listener goes along with several other things on this list. When someone feels like they are being listened to, you are much more likable to that person. When a person feels heard, they also feel respected and valued. If there was ever anything that will endear to you a person, it’s being a good listener. This may take some practice, but with time you’ll be better and better at it.
Being likable is something everyone craves, but it is possible. If you have tried everything on this list and still have trouble feeling liked, speak to a mental health professional to rule out other issues that could be interfering in your attempts to be liked by others.
With some time and practice, you can easily become the person everyone likes and improve your own quality of life at the same time. Good luck!